i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
