You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize