if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
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