Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Randomize