Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Randomize