I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
