whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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