I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
