I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Randomize