U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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