I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
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