Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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