she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
