Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Randomize
