just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize