How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
