I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
