hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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