Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
