She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
