Need sex. Gaining weight.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
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