how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Randomize
