Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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