apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
