I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Drake has all the answers
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
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