I'm really into asian looking animals
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
