okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
