i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
