he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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