garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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