Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
