smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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