my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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