Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
