Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize
