do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Randomize
