Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Farmville is her only friend.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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