SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
