I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
