I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
