Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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