Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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