It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Randomize
