HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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