I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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