I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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