So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize
