Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
