I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
