I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Randomize