I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Randomize
